Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
It's blow job season.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
