I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
So much rum. So many feels.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize
