Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize