I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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