you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
