Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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