we're blogging at a bar
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
