if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
