How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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