so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
