windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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