Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
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