Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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