You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
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