I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
