I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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