if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
