your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I want to fling myself into the sun
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Drunk is a universal language darling
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
