Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize