Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
