Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
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