I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Randomize
