does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I love having hate sex.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
