I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Michael Bay diarrhea
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
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