how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
How naked do you want me to be?
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