i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
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