I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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