What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize