you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Randomize
