I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Randomize
