I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Randomize
