what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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