Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
The best revenge is premature balding
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Randomize