At least make sure they are 18
Why
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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