I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize