her vagine was all disorganized.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Randomize
