just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Randomize
