He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
