Just mADE A PArabola og urine
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I have feelings that need drinking.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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