No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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