Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
