we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize