I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
