it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Success! We fucked roommates!
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