Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Randomize
