So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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