i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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