i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
handjob tips. give me some.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
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