where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
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