yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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